Pluggin' Away

So it's official--I'm working on my second book, but this book will not be self-published.  No, I don't have a publisher yet, but I won't stop until I get one.  And, no, I haven't tried to get one yet either, but I will. Yes, I will.  I'm actually going to take some stories from my first book Sunbathing in a Body Cast and add a whole bunch more and rename it Sunbathing in a Body Cast:  True Stories of a Resilient Runt.  I was going to call the book I'd Like to Thank My Colon but I think the other title holds a bit more pizazz to it.  It's hard to carve out time to write every day, but this past weekend I sat down for 15 minutes and wrote 1200 words, so I know I have it in me.  Most of the stories deal with social observations, being a mom, crazy things I think about, my walk away from corporate America, and plenty o' self-deprecating humor. 
Amidst this work in progress, I have the date of Dec. 11 looming in the back of my mind because that's when I'm going to get my hip replaced at the Cleveland Clinic.  It's hard to not let that be the only thing I think about every day.  Of course my brain goes to a dark place and hopes I don't kick the bucket on the operating table.  It's not likely, but wouldn't that just be my luck?  Today I went to run after my 20-month old and could barely do it from the stiffness and pain in my hip, so I'm looking forward to the day when I can do it.  I'm not even 40 and I'm slowing down and it's a reality check.  People always talk about how one day you'll feel old and it's shocking to have that one day be this day.  I'm active and healthy and strong, but this feeling of slowing down is suffocating to me.  I want to be able to run after my kiddos when they're young, but I also want to do really cool stuff with them when they're adults like travel.  Cece and I talk about going to Italy and she's told me countless times about how she's going to be "a single lady and travel."  So Mama needs this hip to keep up.
So beyond the thoughts of this surgery and teaching writing classes every day and running after my family every day, there is a start of my next book, and in my bones I know it's good.  It's good because ever since grad school I've been quietly sitting back and absorbing as much as I can about writing.  I finally feel like I get it. It doesn't always come out as though I get it, but I do get it now and I hope I have the courage to keep letting it out.